Well, this time around I decided to be true to who I am. No accepting things I don’t want. No saying things are ok with me when they really are not. No taking less than I deserve. No hiding who I really am and what I really want.
After a few weeks of talking with different men online, I narrowed my search down to two.
The one I didn’t feel as much for, I was honest with. And proving to me that he is the caliber man I thought him to be, he told me that he was leaving the door open for me if I ever wanted to come back and explore things with him. He feels that we could have something really special.
I have to be honest and say that it’s nice having that safety net so to speak. But, I am working on taking my walls down and letting someone in for real this time. I don’t want the net. I want to free fall for once and not be so afraid. I want to believe in love again. I want to believe that there is someone who will be the man I grew up believing I would one day meet and fall in love with. Am I still a child believing in a fairy tale that won’t ever come true?
Who knows where this path will lead. But here I go down that road again…